I was having breakfast with my nephew this morning and I asked him what he wanted to be when he grew up.
not missing a beat, he replied:
“an army soldier.”
my heart squeezed for a split-second.
I’m only his aunt…and still, my heart squeezed.
my thoughts flash-forwarded to this session and I thought of her.
she makes me wonder what it feels like to be her.
if I were her, looking at her handsome grown-up real life marine soldier,
there would STILL be in my mind’s-eye the memory of a five-year-old tow-headed little boy when I looked at him.
and yet, in the same instant, I would admire him and my heart would swell and I know I would be proud.
it was an absolute pleasure getting to hang with this family.
their laughter, joking and happiness over-threw the fly’s, bee’s, heat and mayhem (seriously, it could have won a crazy-town award.)
thank you, mary. I am happy to have gotten to join in with your mayhem for an afternoon.
I remember the way her skin was so soft.
I remember her pearls that lay over her chiffon buttoned-up blouse.
I remember her making me toast…perfect toast.
I remember her jewelry box filled with sparkly treasures.
I remember her…
and she was beautiful.
she was MY grandma.
smiling at my own memories and then getting to watch THESE beautiful ladies love their nana and pour over their nana’s treasures
is something that I won’t soon forget.
what was even more amazing, was getting to watch the newest generation,
not yet knowing the treasure of the memories they were making in playing with her party gloves,
in getting to hear detailed descriptions of just who was in those funny old black and white photograph’s that filled those old trunks,
watching this newest generation spend sunshine time with their nana but also with their mother’s nana
is a memory that one day they will look back on and smile.
THIS was a beautiful afternoon of getting to photograph a beautiful legacy of a family I so greatly admire.
“the Road goes ever on and on down from the door where it began.
now far ahead the Road has gone, and I must follow, if I can,
pursuing it with eager feet,
until it joins some larger way where many paths and errands meet.
and what then? I cannot say.”
J.R.R. Tolkien, The Fellowship of the Ring
I almost skipped another monday mind dump day…knowing my melancholy thoughts weren’t light and encouraging per se…
but this is what is on my mind this monday night.
this and the wonder as to how a truth-filled mind becomes debased.
bad becomes good…good becomes bad.
I’m looking for the louder Voice.
the narrow road.
there is no other recourse but to continue…
I’m praying the eagerness will begin again in the morning.
so instead of realizing that there are those who are no longer on the Road with me,
I’ll smile at the knowledge that those who are still on the Road have chosen to be.
it makes the Road less long…less lonely.
and it makes my heart light again.
echo’s of last night laughing on lindsay road with young friends I love.
talking on the phone with a forever friend, no matter how many months and miles are in between.
being myself with my “armor bearer”…never having to re-explain, doubt, wonder, or be anything but myself.
knowing that in the morning, she will talk to me and I will be sane again for another day.
and best of all, going to sleep tonight with my head on his heartbeat…beating my jumbled thoughts into a more manageable straight line.
today, tomorrow, always…
I LOVED this session.
one, because this beautiful lady is someone I’ve grown to love a lot this past year.
and someone who my daughter pretty close to idolizes.
almost every week she takes time out of her busy schedule to teach my daughter how to ride and care for horses.
something that I could never do, and honestly something I admire tremendously that she can.
and two, because I got to have a front row seat to seeing her and her love.
I felt a little bit like when I watched Bambi for the first time…
I’m laughing now, because that’s exactly like how parts of this session were for me.
he loves her.
and I don’t think I could ever get tired of seeing how he makes her smile.